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Began by Jay, starting with a conversation between Jean-Paul de Roover, a helpless bystander, and Jay. Jean-Paul described "The Vagina Game", wherein you take a band name and replace one word with the word vagina, resulting in instant hilarity. So, it was either Vagina Wizard or Electric Vagina, with Vagina Wizard barely winning out.

Vagina Wizard plays a crushing blend of drone metal and stoner doom, entirely improvisational and entirely for a good time.

They played their first show on Dec. 19th, featuring drone and stoner versions of Christmas classics Jingle Bells, Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, and an extra special feedback version of Silent Night. Other shows followed, each becoming subjectively more ridiculous than the last. The "I Don't Know How To Play Guitar" Set, which included a polite cut off from the bar staff, the Broken String Set, The John Faulconer Set to an almost empty bar, the infamous Chuck Finale set (which resulted in his inclusion into the band) and a couple of other ones not really worth mentioning. During this time, Vagina Wizard opened for a couple of really awesome bands, including Caulfield, The Killing Field, Derelict, B.A. Johnston, Rusted Dawn, and Young Tongues (formerly known as Datacave and played as fast as they were malnourished). Blood was shed, swears were yelled without mercy, and a perverse amount of fun was had by the band and their audience (not including the audience).

One of the most hilarious shows, however, turned out to be somehow quite controversial. Vagina Wizard almost opened for the politically charged bands Lab Rat and Rape Revenge. Which is to say, Vagina Wizard played, but their set was somehow offensive enough to make the two bands leave the venue without playing. A fairly amusing account of the controversy can be read here.

Vagina Wizard is currently on hiatus, while Jay's guitar is being resurrected by Mud through his dark drug rituals, Dave returns from the hospital after eating 300 hamburgers in one sitting, and Chuck Finale finds the one true object of his desire, Eris' Crystal Chalice. The Crystal Chalice, when quaffed from, will grant him the knowledge of Elysium, with which he will bring the world into a New Age of Prosperity And Nachos.


  1. Myspace: